It’s 22:07 on Tuesday 20th of July and I think I have just been wolf -whistled at. Below are a list of reasons why this may have been a mirage, daydream or part of heatstroke

1. I was walking my dog and holding a bag of dog poo
2. Wearing  my husbands Bermuda shorts (with a fetching jungle flower pattern on them )
3. Teamed with a vest with a coconut oil stain on the nipple
4. With said coconut oil in my hair, hence looking like it hasn’t been washed for months
5. with my long white chin hair glistening in the moonlight
6. All topped of with a pair of Alan Carr style specs

Upon reflection I believe the whistler  could have been stoned

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