There are lots of questions I don’t know the answer to for example:
Why do people put sweetcorn on a roast dinner?
Why hasn’t someone invented calorie free wine?
And why hasn’t anyone made a more comfortable tampon? it is 2022 for heavens sake !
But when someone asked me the other day ‘what actually is love?’ I felt quite floored.
I don’t think in my 40 years I have ever really stopped to think about it. You just feel it don’t you, it happens in an instant (think Top Shop Galaxy dress circa 2002) or it grows over time, like me and pressure washing.
So on a mission to find out, the answer I asked some of most amazing friends.
There were some lovely answers, like ‘when you miss them and you’ve only just left them’
Love is knowing they make you feel whole.
Love is letting them see you at your most vulnerable.
Love is an attraction of safety, sexual desire affection and tenderness.
Love is home.
Love is when they drive you nuts and you want to punch them in the face, but you don’t, as you wouldn’t survive not seeing them if you were in prison.
Then I tried to understand what I believe love is. Is it when someone you love hurts, and you feel it. Or when someone you love pulls themselves out of a dark place and smashes the life they are meant to live. It is so much more than a word, isn’t it? It’s looking at someone and they look at you and absolutely no words are needed.
It’s looking at your child and thinking all the sleepless nights and the wrinkles are so bloody worth it. It’s when your dog won’t leave your side when you’re having a cry over some bloke that probably doesn’t deserve your tears anyway.
Love is the first person you want to call.
Love is the people who are there, unconditionally, always and without agenda.
This year has been a rollercoaster of love for all the right and all the wrong reasons. The death of my beloved Nan, death of a friend far too soon and then finding love in people and friendships that have been totally unexpected (just like my new love of metal detecting programmes!)
As the new year beckons, I am determined to carry the love into 2023 with me. And this is not a soppy note about love all those around you, including all the plants and animals, sweetcorn lovers etc etc.
But take the love of the people who love you truly and wholly. The ones who proved it in the dark times and celebrated it in the good times. The ones who have the upmost faith in all your bonkers ideas and dreams. The ones who tell you when you’re being a total plonker and the ones who prove time and time again what true love is.
Because I guess in the end love actually might be all you need. x
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